RANDOM THOUGHTS FROM A #MOMBOSS | JILL SPISAK - PUCKER UP MAKEUP BY JILL
Hello boss babes,
My name is Jill, and I am a freelance makeup artist, owner of ‘Pucker up Makeup by Jill’ and educator/makeup artist with the Canadian company, SST Cosmetics.
I have two wee ones: my beautiful 4-year-old daughter, Aria and my one-and-a-half-year-old, blue-eyed babe, Caleb.
I love the idea of sharing my random thoughts within a Mom blog. Let's be honest, when sh*t hits the fan, the first place I turn to is Mommy blogs. It's where I can read and feel sane, feel validated, and usually have a good laugh...or cry. So, thanks for pouring your own souls into this.
I want to be real: raising tiny humans and building an ‘empire’ (yes, my small passion enveloped freelance business qualifies as that to me) is absolutely wonderful, but at times, absolutely emotionally, mentally and physically exhausting. Finding the fine balance to be able to juggle all the aspects of your life (family, friends, work, self-care, etc.) is sometimes like running head first into a jagged brick wall. Or driving. Yes, driving into a brick wall. In a convertible.
As a woman that is extremely passionate about expressing herself, sharing positive body imagery, and providing tools to build self-confidence... it's almost ironic that I also suffer from anxiety and depression and find it hard to practice what I preach sometimes. So, my random thoughts today Ladies, are how I support my mental health and self-care while balancing life as a busy mom and boss:
He always says ’if you don't take care of number one (yourself) how will you be able to take care of anyone else? Truer words have never been spoken. And it's been my mantra for years. Key word: mantra.
It's my husband that makes sure I actually follow it. He is supportive and understanding in all areas of my life. Having a spouse that supports both my need for self-care and my driven boss babe side is the number one reason I, and my wee family are tight knit and successful.
I'm talking about real, true friends that see through your bullsh*t. That call you out when you're squirrelly and spinning out of control and who you call to ugly cry to on the phone because you haven't slept in days and you're wondering when this will get better. When you yelled at your child and you're pretty sure you are an epic failure.
The kind of friends that ‘get’ feeling down or trick you into going to the doctor because they know you are struggling. No judgement. They offer to take your kids so you and your hubby can have quality time together and they support your business, promote your name and celebrate your successes, however small they may be. These kind of friends, are the ones that stand beside you, build you up and make you a better person, mom, and boss babe.
I'm not talking about hiding in the bath for 15mins while chugging a glass of Pinot Grigio that's been open in the fridge for so long it tastes like cold vinegar. I’m talking about taking time out. For you.
Dealing with mom guilt is a real struggle and letting yourself enjoy quality time alone or with whomever it may be is seriously my biggest self-challenge. Because I'm a freelance artist, I travel to my clients and am therefore away from my home. Typically, on weekends. I also work full time during the week, so taking additional time away at times really gets the guilty mom juices flowing.
But here is where I picture my husband’s words, and with his help and my friends, I take care of me. I have to remind myself constantly that just because I truly enjoy doing makeup and it takes me out of the house, does NOT mean that it qualifies as self-care and time for myself. Its ok to put yourself first, boss mama.
Explore new things.
Life with small ones and working can become very routine and busy. Do yourself and your kids a favour and explore new things. Wanna go solo? Work on mindfulness? Or be with the girls?
Here's an experience I recommend with all my heart: attend a meditation ‘moon circle’ at ‘OM Ever After’ in Spruce Grove. www.omeverafter.com
I was introduced to a whole new level of food for the soul after attending my first moon circle and I've begun practicing yoga, meditation, and enjoying reiki in my day to day life as a result.
Exploring with the kids? I live for free activities. Check out familyfuncanada.com for all the kid friendly happenings in your area! Small towns are the best for free activities and luckily, I reside in one. We are always exploring small carnivals, events, handmade shows etc. and the kids love it.
The connections I've made via Instagram with other moms and other people in the industry etc., has helped me grow, connect and balance. I'm not afraid to message and ask questions. I love reading real stories about being a parent and balancing life or reading in general. But please mom boss, don't get caught up in what’s ’internet real’. Don’t compare yourself to the edited photos or the perfectly posed shots. Take what you need and let the rest go.
Find yourself comparing or having envious thoughts? It's time to take a break from social media. Breathe and take a look around your own domain. Focus on finding the positives and have a grateful heart. After all, you are the creator of tiny humans, of a business and of your own empire. You are everything you need to be.